Wish You Could Avoid
Marketing and Selling?
Here are the Reasons Why
If the thought of marketing, selling, tooting your own horn and asking for money in your business practically DRIVES you to chocolate – read on.
Most women were raised with a lot of “negative programming” when it comes to what’s necessary to be a successful business owner. Even if we don’t realize it. Maybe no one told you that you couldn’t be a business owner, but most of us (especially over the age of 40) were raised HEARING things like:
Yet when we enter the world of business – particularly as a home-based business owner it’s a whole DIFFERENT world. We’re constantly told:
Dear Woman Home-based Business Owner:
Here’s what I’ve discovered: There’s a big disconnect between what you were told growing up which is part of your subconscious mind and what you’re told you MUST do now as a business owner. Often the two are 180 degrees apart as you can see in the bullets above. Most women who hate marketing and selling feel highly uncomfortable selling and “projecting outward.” There’s just something “icky” about it.
When I mentor my clients who are women, it’s not just about the marketing strategy and the how-tos it’s also about helping you getting PAST all this stuff.
What “STUFF” am I referring to? The stuff that:
Discover How to Ask for what You Want in Business....
....and Honestly Feel Good about It
Most books, seminars or coaches who are supposed to help you in business and marketing only give you the broad brushstrokes or the how-tos. They usually come from a testosterone-heavy point of view that’s all about “Damn the torpedoes – full speed ahead!” No woman enjoys feeling like a barracuda, a brazen hussy or a b*tch just because she picks up the phone to make a call or writes a sales letter – and you don’t deserve it. But that’s exactly how we FEEL.
You may be perfectly confident and comfortable when it comes to being outgoing and conversational at social events or even talking about the product or service you’re passionate about. But if you’re like millions of other women business owners, the moment you have to ASK for the sale or talk about your prices – all that confidence drains away.
If You’d Rather Get a Bikini Wax than Sell…
… Read on!
Why does marketing, selling and tooting our own horn make us FEEL squidgy?
Because as a woman (again, this is more so for over 40 women) you probably got some pretty negative unspoken messages growing up. Even if it was good to get your education to "have something to fall back on.” The people who were really supposed to handle making money – the nitty gritty stuff of life – were our husbands. If your mom was the one who went to PTA meetings and made the cupcakes for the bake sale or did a myriad of other things she never got more than a “thank you” for – you probably got the message that a “good woman” is one who GIVES her time away and never asks for anything in return.
Which really sucks when you consider the millions of women today who are single heads of households and raising kids. There is NO husband. You’re on your own and responsible for all the bills and making enough money to do it all. Even if you’re married, chances are you need income from both of you to pay your monthly bills and save a little for the future.
Just like many of us are still doubling up trying to keep the house perfectly clean and take care of business or make homemade meals and watch after our cash flow. We’re juggling more and wearing more hats than ever before and there are no signs of the money PRESSURE slowing down anytime soon.
Why Women Usually Earn Less than Men The Unvarnished Truth
A book I read last year about why men still out-earn women in the job market revealed some interesting facts: On average women still earn 78 cents for every dollar a man makes. Did you know when you negotiate your salary rather than accept the first offer on average you can often increase your salary by 20 percent? That’s the average. People who negotiate get about 20 percent more right off the bat. (There goes 20:22 percent of the starting salary difference.) The problem? Fully 90 percent of women NEVER negotiate their starting salary when they get a job offer. Why? Because talking about money makes them uncomfortable so they accept less.
Over and over again I’ve encountered women who run service businesses and they charge HALF or even less than half of men with comparable skills. They know what they should charge – but they choose to charge much less. When I ask them why they do this they usually respond, “Well, I just want to be nice.” They tell themselves eventually they’ll bring their prices up in line with what they should charge – but they usually don’t have the gumption to actually do it.
Or, women will say, “I’m into win-win.” Which means her customers ALWAYS win and she almost always loses because she’s trying sooooo hard to be nice. Unfortunately, being nice in this way comes with an incredibly high price tag.
Here’s what I know: Since 2001 I’ve mentored over 1,400 women and men mostly in marketing their small and home-based businesses. This isn’t my first rodeo – if you get my drift. Truth is the reason women say they want to be nice is because deep in their HEART they hope by charging less they won’t have to market and sell themselves.
You Might Not always like it –
but I’ll Always Tell You the Truth
Here’s the ugly truth: When you charge less for what you do – other business people don’t necessarily perceive it as “being nice.” Instead professionals think, “Oh, she probably ISN’T as good – because she’s charging about half as others who do the same kind of work.” Yikes!
Marketing and selling isn’t EASIER for women who undercharge for their products and services, either. In fact it’s harder because you must overcome the unspoken perception you’re not as good – even when it isn’t so.
I’m sorry – but I said I’ll always be honest. *smile*
I help women business owners not just create the right marketing strategy and message. But I’ll also help you FEEL good about charging what you’re truly worth. I help you create a strategy, a message and a brand that makes people practically get whiplash turning their head to find out more. I also help you feel more comfortable in your own skin about getting your business out to your ideal customers.
After all, when you go to the grocery store or go to pay your bills or save for your kids’ college or your retirement you can’t exactly say, “Hey, I’m a really NICE person. Would you please charge me a little less?”
No way. You end up get SQUEEZED in the middle financially and that’s probably why you’ve got too much month left over at the end of your money.
Another thought I’d like to share with you.
How to get what You Want
From every Conversation – and Still be YOU
Do you feel yucky and uncomfortable about asking for the sale and asking for money? I discussed this already above but I want to give you another insight: In business it is APPROPRIATE for a business owner to guide and direct a conversation. Especially if you’re the person who asked for the meeting. That doesn’t mean you have to steamroller anyone. I mentor women on how to guide and direct a conversation in ways that are both professional and polite.
You don’t have to be a wimp. On the other hand, you don’t have to BUST anyone’s chops or create any kind of confrontation to get what you want. There’s a middle ground. You can be assertive and get what you want and everyone is smiling and happy and gets what they want.
That was a huge lesson for me in business many years ago. I formerly thought either I got steamrollered or I steamrollered others. I didn’t know how to find the middle ground where I could have great RELATIONSHIPS with customers and clients and still get paid what I’m worth. Just because you’re nice and pleasant doesn’t mean you have to give everything away.
You CAN have it All –
that’s what Win-Win is All about
It’s true. You just have to think strategically, smile and guide and DIRECT a conversation. And that’s something many women find uncomfortable.
Why do you think it’s uncomfortable to guide and direct a conversation? Did you ever hear “speak when spoken to” when you were growing up? Some women didn’t hear those exact words – but the meaning was the same. It was okay to respond – but NOT to make the first move.
I’m just getting warmed up.
Truth is I wrote a book all about differences between men and women when it comes to marketing and selling. It’s titled “Testosterone-Free Marketing”. And, how some of the “training” we got as women is not very helpful when it comes to owning your own business and charting your own course. I HELP women in mentoring by not just giving them the how-tos and step-by-step instructions for creating and implementing your marketing – but if you feel stuck, overwhelmed or blocked I help you understand what’s happening and how to get over it.
How did I figure this out?
Back when I was in my twenties I bought my first business from my former father in law. This was no $29.95 for a starter kit. I paid 5-figures (money I didn’t have at the time) for a business that had been in operation for TEN years. It was more money than I paid for my first brand new car.
I was terrified every time I had to guide and direct a conversation with a prospective customer. I can’t even tell you how much STESS I endured. I would gulp and then haltingly guide and direct the conversation. Sometimes I would be so uncomfortable I would burst into tears the moment I left the meeting. It was awful. I kept at it which led that business to a 40 percent increase in revenues in one year while decreasing operating costs 20 percent.
I sold the business and took my profits and got a sales job that paid straight commissions. Once again I was positively SCARED stiff taking the lead and asking for the money. But I did it despite sweaty palms and lumps in my throat. My first three months in the industry I won a sales contest and felt like a total fraud. I had the numbers to win – but I sure didn’t feel like a winner.
This time I was in an industry that exposed me to speakers and trainers in selling. I bought their tapes and listened over and OVER. But when I got into a selling situation the words just flew out of my head. Time didn’t improve the situation – it just made me feel like more of a loser.
If You’d Rather Not Act like a Guy when Selling You’re in the Right Place
What DAWNED on me years later was that all those sales and motivation trainers were (and most still are) testosterone heavy men. All those tapes and seminars were basically saying, “If you want to be successful in marketing and selling – you better learn how to act tough.” Act like a man. I couldn’t do it. It just wasn’t me. Most women can’t.
So I learned ways to increase my CONFIDENCE while marketing and selling that are effective with my style as a confident, successful woman. Not as a man. Nothing wrong with men. I love ‘em. Love my husband. But I want to be myself. Chances are you want to be yourself, too.
Hundreds of women over the years who’ve had challenges when it comes to marketing and selling have told me, “I just thought it was ME. I thought maybe I was stupid or something.” No, you’re not stupid – you’re just a product of being raised as a female in a world where now we do traditionally male AND female things. Like bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan. *wink*
The Best Lesson You can give Your Daughter?
Be a Confident Mom
If you think younger women all have an advantage because they were raised with greater confidence and so they’re all empowered – think again. I’ve had mentoring clients in their early 20s who were hesitant as church mice. Why? It’s nice if a girl is told growing up that she can be anything and do anything. But if her mother or the important older women in her life model behaviors that lack confidence and gutsiness – chances are she will grow up the same. Hesitant, trying to please everyone and wondering what she's doing wrong.
So the best lesson you can give your daughter to help her succeed when she leaves the nest? Good self confidence and healthy self-esteem.
The world is changing: Hillary Clinton said she put 18 million cracks in the “glass ceiling” but the truth is these days when it comes to being a home-based business owner the glass ceiling is something INSIDE of us. No one is holding you back but you and what you’re telling yourself on the inside.
If you’re a woman who dislikes marketing and selling and you’re not HAPPY with the results you’re getting – its time to BUST past your own internal glass ceiling. That’s what I can help you do while giving you awesome marketing strategies and step-by-step direction to get you on the right track when it comes to creating the cash flow you deserve.
What are You Waiting For?
You know it’s time to stop waiting “to get all your ducks in a row.” You know it’s time to stop researching, gathering information and having conversations with prospective customers that don’t go anywhere.
The world’s changing fast. We have to be kind and caring of each other in business and really show that we’re worthy of our customers’ trust. (This will be a big change for some of those Machiavellian types on Wall Street.) We also must dedicate ourselves get more accomplished each day. That doesn’t mean more work. It means more happy, excited “Yes, I want it” answers from prospective customers and clients and less soft-spoken, “Thanks, um, I’ll think about it” answers. It’s time.
Okay, Denise –
I’m Ready to Find out More
Here’s how to take the next step:
Click here now and you’ll be transported to a form so you can talk with me about marketing mentoring. You won’t get an auto-responder. You won’t get more information. I won’t put you on a list. I promise. You will get a personal email back from me to schedule a time to talk about mentoring one-on-one. When we talk I’ll answer all your questions, probably ask a few questions and share my fees with you at that time.
If you haven’t yet read the About Mentoring page – you may want to do that to find out a little bit more about the process of mentoring and what you can expect.
If you are an Info-Marketer, you make money (or would like to) selling information products that showcase your wisdom and ideas – either a coach, an author of books or ebooks, teleclasses, workshops, seminars and downloadable audios or videos – that’s a specialization of mine. I’ve worked with top, top people in this arena and learned a lot of secrets and shortcuts. I make a very nice living. I can help you, too.
If you have a “self-help” or “how-to” book on your heart you really want to get written and out to the world, check out my Book Mentoring page. This is only for people truly serious about writing a book. Tip: being an author is an amazing way to feature what you know and position yourself as an expert – which makes it a great marketing tool.
If you want to kick it up and make it all happen a LOT faster and you consider yourself a discerning person who values and is ready to invest in the best – find out about my Ultimate Marketing Makeover. I literally fly to YOU and spend two transformational days together with you. It’s an amazing program but only for truly dedicated business owners.
If you know all you need is Copywriting Help go to this page. Our words have incredible power. If you’re already marketing savvy and confident but you know writing just isn’t your thing – discover how powerful, impactful and emotionally compelling copywriting can make a big difference.
Whichever you choose – take a powerful step and start moving energy in positive ways – which is always a good thing. It will attract more people to you and your business. Done in the right way it will naturally convert into positive, happy customers and clients who pay you what you’re worth so you enjoy the cash flow you deserve and so that other women around you ask in admiration, “How does she DO it?”
I’m here to serve you and help you grow in your accomplishments, your happiness and more cash flow, too. *wink*
Yours in Success and Joy,
Denise Michaels
Author, “Testosterone-Free Marketing” a Business Bestseller
PS: Investing in your success and ways to achieve the cash flow you deserve is always a great idea and a wise investment – no matter what’s going on in the world. To connect with me about marketing mentoring click here now.
